Being a bridesmaid is HARD WORK. The first wedding I was ever in was for my best friend (pretty much my sister at this point), and I remember getting home from the reception thinking, “Wow, that was a lot more than I was expecting.” While it is so exciting and such an honor to be asked to take part in someone’s wedding, it also is somewhat of a responsibility and financial investment. I figured I’d share some of my tips/things I’ve learned from my friends wedding I’ve been lucky enough to be apart of.
1. IT’S NOT YOUR DAY
Being a bridesmaid is such a huge honor, and while it’s so excited celebrating your friend literally picking out the person they want to spend the rest of their life with, it’s easy to get caught up in it all. I’ve heard stories from friends about how they new someone getting married, and there was always that one girl in the wedding party who would trash every idea/thing the bride wanted to do. Comment on the dress, reception ideas, etc. Keep in mind that this isn’t your day, and your opinion isn’t needed unless when asked. The happy couple are picking planning things around how they want THEIR day to be, and if you’ve either had, or will have your day. So just shut up essentially and don’t be a monster of an overly opinionated bridesmaid.
2. DON’T BE “THAT GIRL” AT THE REHEARSAL DINNER
Rehearsal dinners typically always come equipped with one beautiful thing, OPEN BARS. Open bars are so dangerous, and so so so tempting. When I have free vodka sodas within earshot of me, it’s honestly my version of heaven. However, you have to keep in mind that you are somewhat of a representation of the Bride and who she chooses to associate herself with, and then you also have to stand up in front of most of the people who could potentially witness you being “that girl” the next day at the ceremony. It’s honestly just not a good look and save behavior like that for another night out that isn’t so significant to someones life.
3. THE DAY OF THE WEDDING, COME OVER PREPARED
When I say come over prepared, I mean come OVER prepared. I typically pack a weekend travel bag with sheet masks, phone chargers, gum, snacks, an ice roller (we’ll get to that in a few), hangover pills, my daytime skincare, deodorant, a blue tooth speaker (depending on where you’re getting ready at), contact solution, & tampons (even if it’s not that time of the month for you, you never know who might need one). I guarantee you, someone in that bridal party is going to forget something, and I’d rather bring too much, then get there and realize I needed something.
4. WHATEVER DORKY PICTURES THE BRIDE WANTS TO DO, JUST DO IT
Say it with me, “It’s not my wedding!” If the bride wants to do a picture with everyone posing like Charlies Angel’s, do it. If she wants a picture of everyone looking at the sky and laughing, do it. If she wants a picture of everyone bowing down to her while surrounding her in a circle, just do it. Just because you think it’s lame, the bride might have been looking forward to having a dorky picture or two. & who knows, you might look back in a year or so and be glad you took part.
5. FIGURE OUT HOW THE BRIDE WANTS HAIR/MAKEUP/JEWELRY TO BE ON THE BIG DAY
Nothing is worse than sticking out like a sore thumb during a wedding ceremony. Figure out what vibe the bride is going for and stick to it. I’ve been in weddings where the bride was very “whatever” with what we did, then I’ve been in ones where there are very strict guidelines with what we do with our hair and accessories. For example, I was just in a wedding where the bride had a strict #nohoop policy. I totally didn’t read the itinerary for that well enough, and I ended up having to walk to a store near the hair salon to buy some studs for the ceremony. Figure out what it is they want you to do for hair, makeup, and accessories in advance and you’ll be able to properly prepare.
6. EAT RIGHT(ish) AND TAKE CARE OF YOUR SKIN/SELF BEFOREHAND
Pictures from someones wedding LAST FOREVER. Not saying you have to lose weight or any of that by any means, but you want to be feeling good during all the festivities. Eat your veggies, drink plenty of water, get plenty of sleep, try to cut back on alcohol, and take care of your skin in the weeks leading up to the big weekend. No one wants to be the one looking like a complete hot mess in all the formal wedding photos. I try to incorporate a green smoothie each morning (that’s about it food wise honestly), drink a lot more water than I normally would, and get at least 7 hours of sleep each night. I also incorporated ice rolling into part of my routine as well. Using an ice roller is pretty much the same concept as rubbing ice cubes on your face but it’s just less melty. You’ll be glad when you look back on pictures that you took care of yourself a little extra, at least I always am.
7. GO WITH THE FLOW AND CELEBRATE THE BRIDE
Weddings are typically planned out wayyyy in advance, and with all things planned in advance something is bound to go wrong. Don’t stress last minute tweaks to things (again, not your day), and make sure the bride feels loved and celebrated! You (hopefully) only get one wedding day, and I know when my time comes, I want to feel like I’m the absolute center of everyone’s universe on that day. Going a little out of your way to make the bride feel extra special will make for a happier bride, and those memories are ones I bet she’ll never forget.
At the end of the day, have fun and remember this is a celebration. Let your hair down (within reason), make a fuss over the bride and groom, and feel honored AF that someone thought enough of you to ask you to be in their freakin’ wedding. I mean come on, that’s huge.